Tips To Get A Kinky Date

Nobody knows for sure if it is the Internet, the pop music (and corresponding video clips) or some other influence. Fact of the matter is that more and more people find their way into alternative lifestyles. As a result, large numbers of people try to “date kinky”. And that may be a little more difficult than many people expect it to be.

 

Outsiders especially often have problems finding their way into alternative lifestyle communities and even more trouble finding a partner.

 

Here are the five most important “do” and “do not” issues:

 

Do not buy a pair of leather pants and start patrolling the neighborhood hoping someone will pick up your “signal”. That will not work and you can work around until the cows come home. Sure enough the kinky people will notice what you are trying to do. They will however also have a good laugh about your actions as soon as you are out of sight. Do actively engage in conversation! If you fancy someone and fancy a spanking, simply say so – albeit not in your pick up line. These days most people will not shy away from kinky subjects. In fact, you will probably grab their attention.

 

Do not be overly optimistic about the results of your kinky Internet dating plans. Kinky Internet dating works sometimes, but most of the time it does not and you will end up with no date at all or a major disappointment. Do inform yourself about meeting spots in your area. Swingers clubs, BDSM groups and quite often concerts are excellent meeting (and dating) opportunities. You will find them in Yahoo groups or with a bit of creative Internet searching.

 

Do not try and play the “I have seen it all before” type if you have not. Kinky communities are small and they form an in crowd. They will spot your facade from Miles away. Do be honest. If “going kinky” is new to you and you are somewhat uncertain and shy about it. That is perfectly okay and people will applaud your honesty about it.

 

Do not start out with buying lots of high end sex toys such as luxury vibrators from sex toys online store. That is much like buying a car stereo and a set of snow tires without owning a car. Do invest in finding a partner, mate or play buddy. There will be time enough to go out and buy the luxury sex toys, cuffs, whips and other stuff. Doing that together is much more fun anyway.

 

Do not assume people are into anything and everything just because they are kinky. Someone into spanking wants to spank or be spanked. Actual intercourse for example is usually not a part of that process, regardless what you may see on pornographic movies and pictures. Do ask! More experienced people especially will be more than happy to talk about – and explain – the dos and do nots of their kink. Eventually that makes things more fun.

Blindfolded

Bondage and How To Get Your Woman To Want You To Restrain Her

Women love bondage and kinky sex because it allows them to “let go” and fully surrender to their man.

 

It also makes them feel naughty. And women love to get naughty in the bedroom. It’s just a shame that most men don’t have what it takes to bring out their woman’s really naughty side.

 

Another reason why bondage and restraining is so powerful for women is because society has conditioned many people to think that if a woman really wants sex – then it makes her a slut. This viewpoint is of course nonsense, but it is in many people’s minds none the less.

 

The power of bondage is that it gives the woman the feeling that she couldn’t stop it even if she wanted to. In other words – it allows her to let the man take all the ‘blame’ for the sex. She was just the weak, innocent women, being led astray and made to do naughty things by a big, strong, sexually confident man.

 

Now if you have never used bondage or any type of restraining with your woman before, you must proceed with caution. Do not push your woman outside of her comfort zone because if you do – you’ll end up stopping her wanting sex, instead of turning her on more than ever before.

 

If you want to turn her on more than ever before and get her totally hot, wet and excited to have sex with you – bondage is a great way to do it, if you do it right.

 

Start out slowly.

Get a pair of handcuffs from a “sex toys online store“.

 

Then, when you are on your bed with your woman and she is getting turned on – take out the handcuffs and join one of her hands to one of your hands.

 

This will restrain her and make her feel like you are in charge. (Note: Every woman wants their man to BE IN CHARGE in the bedroom).

 

However, by joining her hand to one of yours, instead of the bed (or another piece of furniture) you stand less chance of freaking her out and making her feel uncomfortable.

If your woman responds well to this, you can progressively make the bondage a little more severe each time you use it with your woman in the bedroom.

 

For example, you could tie her hands together, or tie her hands to the bed (most women love this if you build up to it over time and she really TRUSTS YOU).

Of course, you don’t just have to use handcuffs.

 

If your woman ends up really enjoying being restrained, you can use everything from your own hands to a silk tie to restrain her.

Just remember not to rush her into anything to risky too soon and always be safe.

 

One final point to remember is that by restraining your woman – you are aiming to increase the sexual pleasure for her. So make sure you still give her lots of orgasms.

 

Every time you take your woman to the bedroom – multiple orgasms must be a reality for her (otherwise she won’t be fully satisfied).

 

Also read: The Case for Men’s Sex Toys – Why You Should Be Using Them